How You Heal

Knowledge is Empowerment. Below is a practical map to trauma and trauma healing.

To start, you are born GOOD and into a GOOD universe.  

You're born with intrinsic qualities that all humans share. They include creativity, intelligence, zest, service, and connection. 

You come in LOVING connection. Loving humans. And wanting AS MUCH  connection and humans as possible. 

Life is benign. Meaning it does not want to hurt or harm you. 

Still, hurt and harm happen. 

Brilliantly, your little body knows how to heal any hurt and harm SPONTANEOUSLY.  This is called the DISCHARGE RESPONSE. 

The discharge response is always psychosomatic and includes crying, shaking,  laughing, explosive movement, yawning, and sweating. 

It is the body feeling, expressing, releasing e-motion as energy-in-motion. Animals do this too. Picture a deer shaking.  

The greater the hurt, the greater the need for discharge.  

As long as the discharge HAPPENS, the hurt disappears. 

TRAUMA solidifies to the degree that discharge does not happen.  

Discharge ALWAYS happens.

Unless, 

It is thwarted.  

And MANY forces exist to thwart the discharge response.  

These are called OPPRESSIONS.  

There are countless oppressions. Including and not limited to:

- men's oppression,  

- women's oppression,  

- cultural oppression,  

- age oppression,  

- class oppression,  

- you name it. 

Oppressions thwart the discharge response.  

Systems of oppression are culturally repeated and sanctioned to continue tyrannically capitalist culture that enslaves even its own people, (that means you),  and colonizes whatever it can. 

Remember to breathe. 

When a human does not discharge,  

And their hurts do not heal,  

they in that moment create DISTRESS.  

Because trauma is not hurt, a better word for trauma is distress. Distress happens when hurts do not discharge and heal. 

Distress feels awful, much worse than the hurt ever did,  

Because it is a hurt frozen in time.  

Remember hurts are meant to move through 

With energy-in-motion. 

The mind is frozen in conjunction with the body, 

Meaning distress is distorted belief as well as distorted fascia, organs, nerves, and  neurology. 

Over time distress patterns accumulate. It gets intricate and complex. 

And you now perceive yourself, others, and life through the perspective of distress.

You build a personality of increasing distress.  

You experience various degrees of physical and psychological disease and dysfunction. 

All to the degree you did not feel, express, and heal. 

Discharge. 

To the degree you DO discharge and complete the healing process, You return to your inherent qualities and intrinsic relationship with life. 

Your MIND is always trying to discharge. It seeks to have completion, freedom, and joy. 

As such the mind creates circumstances that dominate you into feeling the unfelt feeling. The hurt.  

If you do not feel and complete the healing process, 

You will keep experiencing the same constricting jobs, relationships, and life circumstances. 

It is not happening TO YOU. It is happening FOR YOU. 

For you to discharge. All the way. 

How do you discharge all the way? 

You can set it up or receive it when it comes. 

And discharge is always SPONTANEOUS. 

You discharge when presence contradicts what thwarted the original expression. Only presence heals.  

You find presence, contradiction, and the resulting discharge and healing through your own breath and Self. For really deep distress, which we all carry, others are necessary to help us feel. 

Good friends. Good counselors. And vulnerability. 

If you need presence you are not getting, you ask for it vulnerably  

"Please listen". 

"Just breathe with me". 

"Hold my hand". 

The more vulnerable you are, the better discharge you experience and the more free you get.

You like it and want more.  

So you get better and better at: 

a) asking for what you need 

b) feeling your feelings 

c) releasing stories and being with it somatically 

d) discharging and healing and 

e) helping others in the above. 

Discharge returns you to your original state that is inherently good and wanting connection. It wants to help others. 

And once you understand the healing journey, how people get hurt, and how you can help them, through doing your own work, you cannot help but want to help. You'll be compelled. 

How you do this will be unique to you and in alignment with your gifts, callings, and the needs of the people around you. 

It will be your purpose and service.  

In the process, you will build community,  

dismantle systems of oppression,  

and ever clarify your True Self. 

And while discharging distress is key, it is not the point. 

THE POINT is to get your choice back. THE POINT is to get your life back. The point is to get your mind back.

To trust and follow your mind. In therapy. With friends. So it doesn't have to turn your life into an elaborate theater scene to get you to feel the thing. 

With a free mind, you can set your life up the way YOU want to. Which is usually in complete opposite to the constricts and confines of your early distress. 

We do not need to discharge every hurt.  

We do need to discharge often -- and any statement otherwise is a dysfunctional  bypass --  

And only so much so that we are healthy, happy, creative, kind and free.  Remember, you came in wanting connection. And you knew how to get it. The deepest hurts can be felt and the worst distress can be discharged.  

Some pain pockets can take time -- sometimes years, especially birth trauma,  ancestral trauma, and early sexual memory --  

And a committed mind can free anything.  

It is literally built in. 

Key points:  

- You are good. To the core. 

- Trauma is not hurt. It is distress.  

- It is your birthright and responsibility to discharge distress. 

- You discharge when you receive the presence and permission you need to feel and complete the original frozen discharge response.  

- You can offer yourself this presence. And early hurts require human connection  and support.  

- Everyone got hurt and needs help discharging. So everyone needs healing,  counseling, and therapy. 

- This somatic model is the most complete and refined. It is the quickest way to  heal at the level of cause. 

- Avoid healing systems that do not in some way shape or form understand and  incorporate this healing model. They may offer results and not reach or treat the  root, providing some symptom relief and perhaps an overall and longterm  diversion. 

- Being triggered is the chance to feel and complete something frozen from your  past. It is a gift. So long as you choose to feel it and enlist the support you need to  feel it to completion.  

Opportunities for free support: 

I invest much money into therapeutic somatic support. Counseling, coaching,  therapy. Because rectifying distress at the root level cascades across every dimension, there is no better investment. 

And true wealth is always free. It's always community.  

The best free counseling community on the planet is Re-Evaluation Counseling.  Co-Counseling.  

The above theory is mostly taken from RC. Synthesized with many other models and modalities that all strive to say the same thing. And there is no more complete system than RC.

After doing a short and deep intro course you have access to a lifetime of free,  worldwide super trauma-informed counseling. Visit RC.org and email them saying you'd like to get started. There are groups local to your area. 

In love. May this serve. 

Blake